A Mantra for Accepting Accountability

Accountability! Ooh, scary word? Or invitation? Maybe a mantra can get me where I want to go…

While in the First-Second Degree of Illumination bubble of awareness, I view accountability in terms of blame – “Who did this?!” and “Who’s in charge?!” – looking for a scapegoat to take the fall. I’d like to go beyond that level of competition, defense, and suffering.

Maybe I feel I’ve had enough of it and want to “move on.”

Third Degree of Illumination traverses the “membrane” of the bubble awareness in an instant of choice – a choice point. I usually don’t recognize the point because it’s so fleeting – literally an instant of awareness – a sudden Aha. In that flash of presence, the default choice is to return to the familiar – the bubble. One must remain conscious to make an alternative choice to move on to Fourth Degree of Illumination Acceptance of Accountability.

That’s where a good setup comes in handy. I can use a mantra to prepare my consciousness so that when that instant of awakening comes, I stay attentive to it long enough to “move on” to full acceptance of accountability for my life. Rather than make the default choice to return to my bubble sleep.

I can use a mantra to move me closer to choice point – maybe even ring its bell more often than when I’m deeply asleep in the bubble.

Any choice has at least two options – so I devised a mantra that includes options (“or”) and assumes I’ve already selected and committed to one – the one already in my awareness. My choice mantra is a three-parter that sounds like this:

  1. “I am experiencing EXACTLY what I WANT to experience right now or I’d be experiencing something else.”
  2. “I’m doing exactly what I most want to do right now or I’d be doing something else.”
  3. “I have exactly what I want to have right now or I’d have something else.”

1-2-3, BE-DO-HAVE

I especially appreciate the second mantra: “I’m doing exactly what I most want to do right now or I’d be doing something else.” I occasionally find myself doing something I don’t like to do – like facing one of my personal demons, the plumbing. Rather than choose the default – get upset and look for someone to blame – I chant my “do” mantra to myself until my body/mind settles down. Then I get to work.

You see, whether or not I get upset, the job must still get done. I’d rather do the job with a smile than a frown. Within my bubble awareness, doing (action) is key to experience. For a quick morning “wake-up call” this second mantra really sets my day’s tone.

At bedtime, I chant all three and check my body for resistance (sensation). I then acknowledge the body part experiencing a sensation that comes to my attention by including it in my mantra like this: “Thank you, [body part experiencing sensation], for doing what I most want you to do right now.”

When one adopts this mantra as their personal truth, they tend to take accountability for their life and “magical” things start to happen. For one, when I am the responsible party, I have the power to make changes – NOT because I don’t like what I have; rather, because I LOVE what I have and want to experience something ELSE I’ll love, too.

Accepting Accountability

To make a substantial change in your life, consider accepting accountability for it – acknowledge that you are, do, and have what you currently experience because you WANT TO. How you feel about what you experience is your PAYOFF for being you having that belief.

Embrace your payoff – you love it, after all – and you’ve gone to some effort and energy to achieve it. Then look into what OTHER PAYOFF you might enjoy JUST AS MUCH and begin embracing that. Change will happen! Embrace it!

You might also enjoy achieving your current payoff in a different manner. Like the kid in the sandbox making a sand castle, you can play with your design as much as you wish until you get it “just right” – that is, you experience sufficient sensational payoff. Then, simply do it again with a new design. Creation is a fluid that responds to attention!

Remember: You’re living the dream! Everything in your life is YOU being, doing, and having YOU! Let’s acknowledge it, own it, embrace it, and accept it!

Convincing Words and the Third Degree

I tend to use the word, “so” as one of several convincing words to end questioning. Same with the words, “because” and “then” – transition words that move a concept from consideration to conclusion. I use them as Second Degree of Illumination defense to avoid Third Degree of Illumination inquiry and convince myself of my rightness within my First-Second Degree of Illumination bubble.

I use convincing words to invoke consensus as a defense and to halt further investigation. As a conjunction, the word “so” means, “and for this reason; therefore.” (Google) “Because” as conjunction means, “for the reason that; since.” (Google) “Then” and “therefore” conjunctions essentially mean the same as “so”.

Convincing Words and the End of Inquiry

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Truth and Inaccuracy, Right and Wrong

How everything is true and I perceive it inaccurately. Rightness and wrongness, then, may be irrelevant.

This morning, Carol and I sat at our huge picture window overlooking our back yard – wondering. We wondered about the scene before us. Birds crisscrossed our visual field to land in trees adorned with bare limbs serving as perches. Grass hummed below us with the inaudible sound of a million insect steps. We marveled at the vastness of creation that presented itself so verdantly before us.

“It’s an illusion,” we reminded each other, entranced by it all. “And yet, it seems so real.”

Then I recalled three things I’ve been pondering lately:

  • Hoffman’s theory of Conscious Agents in which I came to realize that I don’t perceive the world as it is – rather, I perceive it as I NEED to perceive it in order to be fit enough for my genes to survive into the next generation.
  • Presentations of quantum physics has demonstrated that matter, space, may not exist as I perceive it.
  • Other presentations lead me to believe that time, too, may not exist as I perceive it.

And yet, there it is before me! Time, space, and consciousness coming together to experience… what? Reality? No, can’t be – reality only exists when there is a conscious agent to witness it. My beliefs? Ah, maybe…

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The Sacred Secret

When I was an infant, I didn’t ask questions – I just cried, ate, slept, and pooped. As I grew older, I asked questions about things I didn’t understand – my mother would argue I had a “why” question for just about anything at all. No matter the answer I’d get, I tended to accept my understanding of it as the truth. After all, I was asking my parents who were gigantic and therefor gods to me. I loved and trusted them because I knew no other way. They were sacred to me. I might question an answer – “And why is that, Mommy?” – but I’d never dream of questioning her or her motives! That was sacred ground not to be trodden.

I was so completely trusting and naive that it never occurred to me that I could question what I was taught. All I knew how to do was to accept what they told me as truth.

It was the beginning of a life-long journey in the sacred land of First-Second Degree of Illumination.

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Defending My Interpretations

My interpretations link with other interpretations to help me feel consistent, validated and safe.

When I experience suffering, I link to previous interpretations of suffering that have defended my story and which validate my current reality of suffering.

No matter how I struggle to change my yet unregulated responses to experience, as long as I believe my core program is consistent, that suffering is “real.” I will continue to interpret my experiences as suffering. It’s a positive feedback loop that sustains and strengthens my resolve to defend the reality of suffering over time.

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