Everything Feeds Down Here

“Everything feeds down here” represents my view of the instinctual world, in which every living thing must eat in order to survive. In this world, it feels like I have free will, and yet I experience a life of complete control – lots of “musts” and “have to’s” – needs.

All living things instinctively feed to survive. Humans have learned to feed on multiple levels of life, including themselves. There is a metaphoric similarity to the physical feeding process – at the psychological level. When the mind allows thoughts and emotions to create and play out need/fulfillment scenarios, loss and gain can seem just as real as at the physical level.

I define “feeds” as actions intended to satisfy a need by depriving another life form a choice of energy flow. A feeder is one who lives by this credo.

One type of feeder is the parasite, that takes from its host without apparent benefit to the host. I become such a feeder when I perceive a lack or need in my Self and consider a plan of action to fulfill that need at the expense and without regard for the welfare of an intended target. In that frame of mind, I seek out and find a target that represents what I believe will fill my lack. Then I act without conscience to take what I need – usually through attack. I then justify satisfaction of my need/fulfillment through defense of my actions – “I had to…” and “I had no choice…”

Soon, I find myself defending my defense – often by attacks of increased ferocity, which often results in even more feeding and more attacks. This self-supporting feeding pattern appears behaviorally like when one loses self-control – like losing one’s temper.

Recognize the Second Degree of Illumination defense in this?

Once a feeder draws life from its prey, a sense of disconnection occupies the feeder’s mind, which must forever after justify itself for an energetic reward. Psychological feeding becomes its own reward – a “fix” that I must have.

The feed process is a causal system:

  • the mind allows thought to perceive lack in its Self.
  • thought seeks to end lack by instinctual means – to act without conscience – conscious connection.
  • thought closes the circuit of its process by justifying its actions and by attaching emotional support to thought truth – memory.

My mind begins to understand wholeness as I practice being aware of connection. When I believe I am whole, I can believe I am my own source.

Fear and Completion pt 3


“Thanks, I needed that!”

I occasional employ a thought state-breaker like, “Snap out of it!” to awaken me through the use of fear. By using fear as a tool to create a startle response, I can stop my inner conflict with wholeness. I can help myself to move towards completion of something I feel is incomplete. I can break free of my stuck state of mind through a sense of completion.

From a motivational perspective, “state-breakers,” based on fear-as-a-tool, abruptly nudge my mind onto a different path. Using the not-too-subtle suggestions to, “Knock it off!” “Get your act together!” “Shape up or ship out!” “Yo dude!” “Hello?!”¬† “Really?!” “WTF?!” “Come again?!” and “*%$&#@$ – (%#@)*?!” I force myself out of a mental stalemate between fearful thoughts of defense and fearless thoughts of flow – towards completion of what I really want. Read more Fear and Completion pt 3