As we mentioned in the last post, a story associated with emotional hurts is only useful to access its emotional load. Once the emotional load has been effectively dealt with, the hurtful story is of little or no consequence – perhaps for learning… maybe…
I justify my emotions with “reasons” – background stories that make my emotion and my subsequent behaviors seem realistic and reasonable. Those justifications are necessary as validation for my emotions – which emotions require some reason or justification for being. It’s a cycle of need as we’ve discussed earlier.
Does it not seem logical, then, that once I’ve dealt with the emotions associated with an event (hurtful story), I might invest future energy into emotions I want – rather than ruminating on stories that regenerate negative emotions I’d prefer to release and let go?
I think so.
When a story you experience triggers within you an emotional response, good news! You’re now in possession of information about you of which you may have been previously unaware. Deal with the unwanted emotional load involved. When you do, I’m sure the story associated with it will change substantially. Cool.
Because the initial hurtful story was a justification for the emotions involved, the story is malleable – changeable! That means you can consciously change it. In fact, the original story was most likely untrue – false! So, make up a new, untrue story to take its place that includes emotional cues that support and sustain you in the way you want now to be supported.
I just love it when someone tells me that I live in a fantasy world. OF COURSE I DO! And I’m SO grateful that I do. That fantasy world allows me to mess with my mind by adjusting and sometimes outright making up memories the way I WANT THEM TO BE.
As a result, I live my life in a much more stable emotional bubble of my own making. Life is my fantasy and I’m all about continuing that trend!
Truth is – my life has always been a fantasy of my own making because I am the one making the observations and interpretations and evaluations of sensual evidence. Nobody else does my thinking and feeling for me – I do that. And then justify it with stories that seem to me to fit my observations.
It’s all me!!! And it’s ALL FANTASY! So, why not make the most of it everyday?! Why not, indeed!