…from NEED!
Let’s assume for a moment that one of the first experiences of life is a sense of separation. Yet how can life perceive separation without also believing connection possible?
While pondering the question, I first considered the fact that all manifestation as I’ve experience it has been based on cause and effect. I wonder – behind every action/reaction is there a “because?”
Perhaps cause and effect support reality as a response to need.
A Pendulum of Need
Loss and gain are a sort of pendulum of need, in which I bounce back-and-forth between need inherent in loss deficit and gain deficit, manifesting experience through conflict – such as when I compete and judge. Deficit on one end of the pendulum is represented by fear, while the deficit at the other end is represented by justification of that fear. Each end of the pendulum draws life force energy through projection – I literally expel energy to keep the loss-gain fear-need pendulum going.
To figure out how much force to exert to swing the pendulum, I invest in valuation – attributing value that equates to emotional energy I can muster to push against cause and effect.
Application of Value
When I place a value on anything, including myself, I feel the need to defend that which I value. A “thing” only has value as I apply it – nature values all the same, neutral – so any defense that arises is of my valuation rather than of the thing itself. Soon, I forget the subject of my valuation and my defense, in the form of justifications or reasons, becomes the object of value that I feel the need to defend.
Let me say that again – Nature needs no defense because Nature has no needs – it just is what it is. It is I who feels a need to apply value and to defend MY valuation with JUSTIFICATIONS.
When I feel my values are threatened, it is because I need to believe…
- I have value
- that threats are real
- that value can be threatened
- that my value has to be defended
- that my value can be defended
The chain of cause and effect makes need REAL.. because I need to believe
- I am real
- I am separate from others
- my values are real
- I can’t misunderstand my needs
- my beliefs are real and valid so others should accept them without question
- others know what I want and value without me having to communicating it to them
My every thought calls for the actions of cause and effect. I project who I think I am with and between every breath I take. Each time the pendulum passes the zero point, with each cause and effect cycle I experience, I am being handed opportunity after opportunity to awaken to self-understanding.
Whether I believe I am being positive or negative, when I feel the need to justify my actions, there will be a cause and there will be an effect – a need pendulum that I expend my life force energy to satisfy, yet never can because I need “becauses.”
