Ah, arguing – my need to prove my value by upstaging the resourcefulness of others in an effort to get my need for validation met, appearing more right than others as a means of showing value. This lack of understanding limits me from feeling secure with who I am.
Arguing IS the point –
Objective Argument – The relationship between two or more aspects of a whole, such as cause and effect, up and down, close and distant. These are external to the mind and include measurements, mathematical calculations, empirical evidence, etc.
Subjective Argument – My perceptions and judgements attached to objective arguments. These are internal such as thoughts, feelings, character evaluations, moralities, etc.
If I endeavor to prove my value by proving rightness, I may feel driven by that agenda to be acknowledged as relatively more important by diminishing the worth of others. The intent in this model is to belittle others by means of proving them wrong. This can create an image of the belittler as petty and mean-spirited.
When my intent is to bring truth to light, my goal is to encourage individual collaboration to that end, I utilize argument as a tool for clarifying understanding, I remove offense and defense from the equation, and the result is an honoring of value individually and universally.
All arguments are complements that validate and give value to their counter’s existence by virtue of their own existence.
The Role of Importance to Arguments
Importance is a subjective judgment I place on my level of investment in my argument and lack and its fulfillment. The more importance I place on my life, for example, the more defense I’m likely to present to argue it. This psychologically equates to the judgments of importance I place on my rightness and my fear of being wrong.
Behind every argument is a truth about ME. Considering my needs through investigating my argument can put me on a path to enlightenment and understanding about who I really AM.